Cedar attacked another dog. She went berserk. I have to pay more than $700 in vet bills AND deal with my furry little maniac now. She's on a definite Strike One, but I don't know how many she gets until she's out.

It's very difficult to remind myself that this is not a failure on my part, that things like this happen, that I may well have to give her up and it won't entirely be my fault.

My grandfather's health continues to decline - I can't get ahold of my dad, who is in Chicago visiting him, for an update.

If bad things really do come in threes, then I'm going to hope for a disappointment along the lines of the Ducks losing the game on Sunday.

My dad flew to his hometown this afternoon because his father's health continues to deteriorate. The only person I've had a sensible, honest conversation with about all of this is my brother - for some reason, talking to my parents about it makes me check out. In fact, I keep checking out anyway. This may or may not be denial.

I have mosquito bites. Hooray for spring being on its way and all, but I thought I could get away with at least a few more months of not itching like crazy.

Meeting people in a new city is hard, but it's getting easier. I felt at home for a minute not too long ago. It was soothing.

Camera is still kaput. Not taking pictures is starting to have an effect. (In a weird way I'm grateful - I was starting to wonder if the creativity had drained from me entirely or if it had just been beaten back.)

to do

Overseas disaster relief.
Teaching English abroad.
Law school.
Find a damn date in this town.
Train Cedar into reasonable habits.
Train self into reasonable exercise/eating/caffeine/alcohol habits.
Laundry.
Learn Spanish.
Become comfortable and competent at work.
Visit grandparents in Chicago.
Road trip to family cabin in the Sierras.
Re-finish new table and add shelves to it.
Brew up a satisfactory red ale.
Live somewhere else for a spell.
Live in Portland for a spell.
Get over self enough to ask grandparents about family history.
Pick up the trumpet again and exceed prior level of proficiency.
Make that apron I keep talking about.
Use up the snap peas and spinach in the fridge (stir-fry?)
Read.
Write old friends.
Save dough for tattoos and vacations and emergencies.
Make dentist appointment.
Relax.
See Black Keys at the Crystal while NOT complaining about the Crystal.
Get over people and things I should have gotten over a while ago.
Hike Latourell Falls and Larch Mountain.

ETA: Send something to Grabman.
Find freelance work.
Chop wood.

snags

The pup bites occasionally - it's only been me and another dog (who was admittedly being a jerk) so far, but there's never a call for biting. I don't know what prompted her aggressive kick, and I don't know how to stop it. She's in doggie therapy (as much as I can afford, anyway, which isn't much), but I have to keep a fairly close eye on her, which is difficult and draining. Unpredictability around other dogs is not okay, but it's hard to figure a way to train her out of it. C agreed to take care of her for the weekend so I can get a break. I'm looking forward to friends, basketball, Bier Stein, VV&B, and perhaps a trip to the Reasonably Priced Comics Shop.

Work remains fast-paced and somewhat frustrating. I'm severely micro-managed and will be until I prove my mettle. The thing is, my immediate superior demands a standard of perfection on par with her 10+ years of experience. There's no way that's going to happen after a matter of months. Oy vey.

I had to dump my homebrew - it got infected. Need some better tubing and a sanitizer that doesn't give me chemical burns, which I plan to procure in Eugene.

We're over the winter hump - theoretically it will rain less soon. Hooray!

Grabman: I keep losing your address. Please to email?